Q-train at rush hour: (rush hour interlude)
[happy robot:] Stand clear of the closing doors. (ding-dong)
[conductor:] LET GO THE DOORS! YOU'RE HOLDING UP THE TRAIN!
[stern robot:] Ladies-and-gentlemen, do NOT hold the doors when leaving the train...
N-train in the 60th St. tube: The Deep Tunnel Sermon is a long string of boilerplate psa's used to entertain passengers during noisy high speed under-river crossings, etc.
[official robot:] Ladies-and-gentlemen, an important" rumble rumble "from the New York City" rumble rumble "Department. Keep your" rumble rumble "within sight at all times. Be alert, and...
[conductor:] NEXT STOP QUEENSBORO PLAZA. TRANSFER TO THE SEVEN.
...and thank you for riding M-T-A!
information: (satirized, yet close in format to the many non-informative prerecorded advisories that the conductor may select from)
[advisory robot] Ladies-and-gentlemen, we are being delayed because a stegosaur is jammed in the tunnel. Please be patient while it is removed.
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